Womans-Corner
Articles and Information for Working Women and Family
Special Needs Children

The advice contained within these articles is offered for your consideration by Lisa Simmons. You, as a parent or professional, must decide whether any of the ideas presented here should be implemented in your unique situation. The staff of the Ideal Lives Project encourage all site visitors to always utilize this information in a manner that is respectful and in the best interest of their child, student or loved one.

Five ways to be a better advocate for your special needs child
by Lisa Simmons

If your child has a disability then chances are your most heart felt desire is to be the best advocate you can for that child. All of us as parents want to feel that we have stood up for our parents and prepared them for the world to the very best of our ability. In the case of a child with special needs, this can be an especially daunting proposition. Here are 5 practical steps that you can take as a parent so that will move you closer to that goal.

1. Get educated

It's important to find out everything you can about your child's specific disability. Read everything you can get your hands on! Look specifically for local & national organization that provide resources as well as tips & educational methods that have been most successful for children with the disability in question. Often a wonderful resource for both support & knowledge is your state's Parent Training & Information Center. If you aren't familiar with this type of organization you can find a directory of the PTI in all 50 states at the following web site - http://taalliance.org. Once your child is school age you will also need to educate yourself about the Special Education process & your child's rights under the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA). Your PTI will also be an excellent resources for this or if you prefer to learn on-line, check out the Special Education resources available at http://wrightslaw.com

2. Get connected

Connecting with other parents of special needs kids will be an invaluable source of emotional support as well as expertise. No one else can offer you the same type of insights into your local school district as parents whose children have been there & worked with those teachers & principals. If you aren't comfortable with face to face support groups, then the internet can supply the next best thing. On-line support groups are springing up all over the web. Take the time to find a group whose membership seems knowlegdable & whose tone puts you at ease. You want to be able to share your questions & concerns openly or the support group will do you little good. If you're not sure where to start, go to a base site such as http://www.egroups.com & search for groups related to disabilities, parent advocates, or your specific diagnosis of interest (i.e. autism). The bottom line is -- it helps to have the support & encouragement of someone else who TRULY know what you are facing. If groups aren't your cup of tea, find at least one other parent who you can use for venting & brainstorming!

3. Get organized

Create your own advocacy notebook with separate sections for school records, medical records, professional evaluations, letters & notes from teachers/school staff, & one for information you've gathered specifically about your child's disability or special education laws/regulations in your state. It's also helpful to keep a copy of letters you send to the school or other professionals regarding your child along with an informal log to track information & commitments gathered on the phone. Take your notebook with you to meetings. You'll not only be better prepared, but you will almost undoubtedly be recognized as a more professional member of the team (which you as the parent, most definitely are!).

4. Get specific

As your child's advocate, the most important skill you can have is the ability to make sound decisions. To make the best decisions you need to have before you the best options & the most accurate information. When you need more information, ask for what you need & keep asking until you get an answer. If you would like to see something different happening with your child's therapy or education, make your request in writing & share any suggestions you have or ideas you would like to see explored. You don't have to have all the answers, but you may be the one who has to ask questions to get an issue on the discussion table. Plus, if you've done your homework & already know about possible solutions -- no one can tell you that it can't be done!

5. Develop your communication skills

It will frequently be important to use your two greatest tools (assertiveness & persistence), but don't fall into the destructive trap of using anger or aggression. These emotions will only damage relationships & distract people from where the main focus should be -- on your child. If you are uncomfortable dealing with a room full of professionals who "know all the answers", remember that you are the only true expert on your child! If you want a full fledged tutorial to help you become an advocate extrodinaire, check out the one at http://www.tourettesyndrome.net/. This exceptional tutorial is written by a parent for parents. It takes you step by step through the process of obtaining special education services & ensuring that they are quality services when implemented.

Always remember that you are the most important person in your child's life! Get help, get support, find resources, but never allow others to replace you as your child's greatest advocate & cheerleader!

All My Best,

* Note: If you should discover a broken link within the above article, please contact the Author and inform them of the problem. Thank you.